Keys to Defeat Loyola-Chicago


Im sure you people have read Morris’ record-setting article on Michigan’s past weekend of basketball. If not, here is the link:

While Morris writes his weekly recap articles and does the only posting, I’m going to finally put my opinions on the internet. But, so we don’t get repetitive here repetitive here I will give you, the reader, my keys to defeating the behemoth that is now the Loyola-Chicago Saint Jeans (Ramblers).


  1. Make shots: No duh, but outside of the TAMU game, Michigan has shot horribly from the floor, especially deep. If Michigan can hit even 40% in the first half, it should open up so many more lanes for the guards to drive to the rack.
  2. Zavier Simpson: If he can continue to lock up like Fort Knox then Clayton Custer is going to have a 40 minute head ache. Loyola hasn’t faced a team as good defensively as Michigan all year and that starts with their feisty point guard.
  3. Worship Satan: If you don’t know by now, Loyola is God’s team thanks to the 98-year marriage he has with Sister Jean. We all know that God is a Michigan Man but happy wife happy life, amirite? We have to combat God. I know it doesn’t sound easy but, heres the good news, we don’t have to defeat God. We only have to neutralize him. The Michigan basketball team is better than the Loyola basketball team but this God guy has been a match up nightmare for almost as long as Perry Ellis was. BADABING!
  4. Beilein Adjustments: John is clearly an elite level coach in college basketball and if he can win the chess match between Porter Moser (he should) he is one step closer to cementing his place as the Michigan GOAT and being arguably the best coach in America.
  5. Mo Early, Mo Often: Wagner is one of those dudes where you can tell what kind of game he is going to have in the first five minutes of the game. I would love to see the offense run through Mo early and if he has it going, get out of his way and let him dominate.
  6. Teske Time: Set your watches folks, if Teske can give positive minutes offensive rebounding and defending the rim than there will be no real lanes for the Ramblers to get to the rim.
  7. Sir Charles: Clearly the best offensive player we’ve had since the tournament started and he needs to continue being that guy. Finally finding his spot in Beilein’s offense has allowed him to score double figures in each tourny game this year and win the West Region’s MVP.



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